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i watched you throw up your insides. i watched you rot so thin. i watched you pause threw breaths. not knowing when you'd end. did you leave because life's cruel? or because God laughs at my pain? i know where ever you are i hope you're in a safer place. you know i miss you and it's hard to live without you. and i know if you can see me these days then i know it must be hard for you too. i wish i would have been there. i know i should have been there. i wish i would have been there. i know i should have been there. i wanted to be there for your last breathe. hold your hand till nothing was left except for your flesh. that's my one regret. you were there for me when i came in. i wasn't there for you when you left. you were there for me when i came in. every day is a struggle. not being able to see your face. my ears grow cold not being able to hear your voice. i loathe this place. i had myself under a false appearance just so they will go away. i hope you know how much i love you and i hope you know how much i care. i wish i would have been there. i know i should have been there. i wish i would have been there. i know i should have been there. i wanted to be there for your last breath. hold your hand till nothing was left except for your flesh. that's my one regret. you were there for me when i came in. i wasn't there for you when you left. you were there for me when i came in. i watched you throw up your insides. i watched you rot so thin. i watched you pause threw breaths. not knowing when you'd end. i wish i would have been there. i know i should have been there. i wish i would have been there. not being there is my one regret!